


Heartbeat

by makuroshi



Series: Eruri 100 Themes [6]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Alternate Universe - Robots & Androids, Eruri 100 themes, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Potentially ridiculous technological jargons, Scientist! Erwin, Some domestic fluff, android with feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-02
Updated: 2014-05-02
Packaged: 2018-01-21 12:50:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1551104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/makuroshi/pseuds/makuroshi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Beautiful,” Erwin says almost breathlessly, reaching out to run a hand along the milky expanse of LEVI-001’s arm, which feels unbelievably soft under his touch.  Just like a human. Perhaps even better. “He’s perfect.”</p><p> </p><p>Unfortunately, he is not.      #11 - 33%</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heartbeat

_In front of his love, he becomes whole._

_And in front of his love, he falls apart._

* * *

 

LEVI-001 is 67% complete when he meets Professor Erwin Smith.

 

His memory capacity hasn’t fully expanded to its maximum threshold yet when his eyes register the sight of the tall blonde man entering the laboratory, but he remembers. Vividly. Lucid and clear as day. Images are imprinted and burned into his circuits forever after he scans through them; once in never out, not unless the data is deleted on purpose. This he realizes is one of his many specifications, the numerous specialties that make him far superior than the prior test models; including sub-zero degree resistance, extremely fluid human-like movements, integrated thermo-sensitive vision and countless others. They may be artificial, but his eyes –shocking silver orbs against the backdrop of pale bloodless skin- are highly vigilant and perceptive, capable of taking in each and every detail down to the very last thread of the man’s clothes.

LEVI-001 may well be what the people call _humanity's hope_ : supposedly impeccable and flawless, the solution to all of humans’ mental limitations and physiological constraints.

For the last five years, the developments of the latest artificially intelligent humanoid have been going smoothly. Fantastic, even. They’ve discovered a way to incorporate induced stem cells into the system for regeneration, along with successful duplication of oxygen transport system and superefficient photovoltaic panels to reduce dependency on electrical energy. The project is no doubt ground-breaking; a first of its kind.  LEVI-001 is scheduled to be unveiled to the public in January next year.

 

Everything _was_ going according to plan, until now.

At 67% completion, the progress bar on the main screen suddenly stills, like it’s been held down by an unknown force.

Regardless of the team’s efforts in fixing the baffling problem, nothing seems to be working. They have even tried rebooting the system –a risky step that might lead to a total deconstruction of the model- but to no avail; LEVI-001 stays incomplete.

 

And this is when Professor Erwin Smith comes into the picture.

 

That morning, 08:27:07 to be precise, LEVI-001 sees the man strides towards the group of white-clad researchers gathered around a spread blueprint, the loud clacking of boots treading the pathway in the sterile room. His steps are well-timed and of almost equal distances, and it takes him only seven steps and a half to reach the mass of people engaging in a heated discussion. Fast walker, LEVI-001 notes in his head, filing the piece of information in his memory along with various other details. 6”2’. Blonde hair. Broad shoulders. Thick eyebrows. Chiseled jaw. Sky blue eyes.

“Professor Erwin!” LEVI-001 hears someone in the group exclaims, loud and clear despite the sound partially blocked by the horizontal translucent plastic vessel he’s residing in. Instantly, the team members disperse and stand in a proper line, bowing their heads in utmost reverence and acknowledgement at the approaching man. Highly respected, he adds to the notes accumulating that revolve around this mysterious individual. Prominent figure. A professor.

“I’m glad you look well, Armin,” Erwin says, giving a friendly pat on the shoulder of the person who has spoken before. “I thought you’d look far more miserable, considering the way you were panicking and stuttering on the phone.”

Armin -the fairly young, timid boy LEVI-001 recognizes as the one in charge of his cognitive and processing abilities, always talking animatedly (albeit one-sidedly) to him in the evenings about the vast oceans and skyscraping mountains and sea of flames- merely smiles weakly at Erwin, dark heavy bags evident under his wide azure eyes courtesy of sleepless nights.

“We’ve tried everything we could think of, but it just wouldn’t budge.  It’s on standby for now,” another one speaks up, voice a bit deeper and laden with exhaustion. “We apologize for causing you much trouble, sir.”

“It’s fine, Jean. I planned on visiting next week, anyway,” Erwin assures, drawing closer to the tube and staring down at it. Through the layer of crystal plastic covering the surface, brilliant blue orbs meet with gleaming silver for the briefest of time, but the fleeting gaze is more than enough to leave an impression on both of them.

 

Intimidating. Resilient. Determined.

 

“Open the vessel,” Erwin instructs, a command that elicits unsure murmurs and silent protests from the researchers. One of them hastily steps forward, voicing out her opinion with much apparent hesitation.

“But Professor, we’re not sure if he—“

“Open it. I want to see him.”

The occupants of the laboratory share worried looks between each other, contemplating on the risk of the unfinished android going out of control if they agree with Prof Erwin’s request. However, they know better than to defy the words of their director, aware of what their leader is fully capable of if he’s upset. Sighing in defeat, Armin walks over to the control panel and presses a few buttons. Instantly, a soft sound resounds as icy vapours are released from the container, escaping rapidly through the small crack that gradually widens automatically. Within a few seconds, the cover has completely retracted, revealing a motionless body that can easily be mistaken for a genuine human being, given how wonderfully sculpted the muscles and structures are. Even the facial features are eerily similar to that of a human, and looking down at the creation, Erwin can’t help but to feel a wave of pride swirling inside his chest.

“Beautiful,” Erwin says almost breathlessly, reaching out to run a hand along the milky expanse of LEVI-001’s arm, which feels unbelievably soft under his touch.  Just like a human. Perhaps even better. “He’s perfect.”

“Not quite, actually. That’s why you’re here, remember?” Dr Hange says, her tone humouring but her implications serious. It is nothing far from the truth, because she’s seeing a possible dead-end in the process, and she’s never one to accept doing things halfway. Hange doesn’t take anything less than the best, not if it involves science and technology.

Erwin chuckles regardless, appreciating the little reminder. Slowly, he bends lower so that he’s face-to-face with the android and gently touches his left cheek glowing under the bluish lights, marveling in its stunning smoothness. Erwin reaches around behind the right ear and slides the discreet button to deactivate standby mode, bringing the android back to ‘life’.

 

“Levi,” he calls out in an almost whisper.

 

LEVI-001 doesn’t blink. Now that he’s off the standby mode and fully utilizing his stored energy, he is far more alert to his surroundings. He catches every twitch of muscles on Erwin’s handsome face and records the curve of the kind smile into his memory. He stores the rise and fall of Erwin’s baritone voice, the fond way Erwin says his name.

 

His name... _Levi,_ is it?

 

“Levi,” he repeats after Erwin, observing the way the Erwin’s cerulean eyes light up in apparent delight upon hearing his voice for the first time. “My name is Levi?” he questions. Never before had anyone explicitly calls him by his name. It has always been ‘001’, or ‘the subject’, or ‘it’, or some other technological jargons; there was never a _name_ , never a given identity.

“Yes, yes you’re right,” Erwin says excitedly, ruffling Levi’s black synthetic hair with affection and laughing in amusement when Levi scowls in return. Erwin holds Levi’s hand –far too icy and lacking human’s warmth, Erwin notices; that he has to fix- and gently pulls him up and out of the cold vessel, much to the onlooking scientists’ horror. A few of them have started to move forward in an attempt to stand on guard, to which Erwin raises a hand that simply says _stop_. “I’m Erwin Smith, the director of this project. I’m here to check on your progress.” Erwin says slowly, not sure to what extent have Levi’s linguistic capabilities developed. Levi nods in understanding, so Erwin continues. “Do you have any recollection of what happened before your system suddenly froze?”

Levi casts his eyes downwards, staring at his bare feet and racking his boundless stretch of memory before looking up and lightly shaking his head. “No, I don’t.”

“Not even an image you see? A person you met?”

“There’s nothing…”

“Nothing at all? Are you sure, Levi? Maybe if you try harder--”

“I said I don’t remember anything!” Levi yells, not comprehending the reason behind his sudden agitation in the first place. But something, something in the way Erwin asks him, pressing on and _interrogates_ him like he’s the one to be blamed for everything, sparks his emotions database, activates his anger. Armin and Jean are already at an arm’s length, ready to capture him if he were to lash out again. Levi balls up his fists at his sides and glares up at Erwin, who is now gazing at him with something akin to melancholy, small smile not quite in place.

 

Levi can’t help thinking that he’s forgotten something very important.

 

Why does he look so pained?

Why, why, why—

 

“It’s okay,” Erwin says calmly, voice smooth and velvety as he pulls Levi into his embrace and rests his chin on top of Levi’s head despite the scalding heat that seeps through the artificial scalp. “It’s fine to not remember.”

Levi would’ve calmed down at that -this is his creator holding him close, his very own reason for existence- but he doesn’t, because it’s not. It’s _not_ fine, or okay or alright or whatever it is humans’ language refers to as, Levi knows this as he recalls the saddened face Erwin makes moments ago, and he feels so _helpless_. Helpless, and guilty.

 

Are androids even allowed to _feel_?

* * *

 

They reach Erwin’s home at 15:53:01 that evening after a few hours’ drive on a rather traffic-free highway.

 

Dr Hange has protested strongly when Professor Erwin came up with the absurd suggestion of bringing LEVI-001 back to his house in the outskirts of Trost, away from the main lab and the rest of the team. She argues that it’s not fair, for Erwin to have LEVI-001 -such an invaluable subject- all to himself after all the hard work and complex researches they have done, but Erwin assures that he has a plan sketched out. “There’s no need to worry,” Erwin has said, placing a comforting hand on Hange’s shoulder. “Have a good rest, everyone. I’ll take care of him.”

It turns out that taking care, from Prof Erwin Smith’s perspective, involves keeping Levi by his side 24/7 regardless of the circumstances, and that includes sharing of bedroom and consequently the bed itself.

“Wait, does this mean that I’ll be sleeping with you?” Levi asks when he realizes that Erwin doesn’t say anything about a separate room, merely showing him the kitchen, dining space and the bath. He can function properly even without the basic needs of humans, but Erwin insists on making him feel at _home_ , which Levi thinks is just absolutely unnecessary and ridiculous.

“You’re under close surveillance, Levi. I can’t let you off my sight.”

Levi frowns and crosses his arms in a gesture he identifies as ‘irritated', not the least bit satisfied by Erwin’s justification. “I might hurt you when you sleep. You know, electrocution or something.”

“You have built-in insulation, in case you’re not aware of that. Which means, should it occur, the only thing you’ll electrocute is yourself,” Erwin replies, a triumphant smirk playing on his lips. “And if you’re alone, it’s more likely to happen.”

 

Of course, there’s no winning against this man, for Erwin is a Levi expert, knows him inside out, more thoroughly than any user manual can ever explain.

 

“Only thirty minutes in and I’m starting to hate you already.”

Erwin simply laughs, happy wrinkles creasing in the corner of his eyes. “Let’s see if I can change that.”

* * *

 

Levi is wiping the bookshelves meticulously -the layer of accumulating dust is just so monumental it kickstarts the clean freak settings in him- when he is pulled away and dragged to the kitchen by an overly eager Erwin.

 

“What’s this?” He asks curtly, staring dumbfounded at the plate in front of him.

“Grilled salmon,” Erwin answers nonchalantly. “Why? You don’t like fish? If you want I can--”

“No, I don’t particularly mind. I just _don’t get it_. I don’t need food to function.”

“You’re right, Levi. But you do have a sense of taste, I personally requested them to add that in,” Erwin says, sitting across Levi and crosses his hand in anticipation. Levi wonders if this is part of his assessment of his software functionality.  Does he even have a digestive tract? “Go on, try it.”

Levi hesitantly takes a bite. He chews, and the moment it hits his tongue, the succulent taste of the food spreads out pleasantly like wildfire, surprising him. It shows on his face, and Erwin grins, delighted.

“Good?” Erwin asks.

 

Levi glares, swallows and cuts out another.

 

“Fantastic,” he says.

* * *

 

The day Erwin fixes Levi’s overall body temperature to match that of a human, Levi complains.

 

“Urgh, your feet are cold, Erwin,” Levi grumbles, roughly shoving Erwin’s legs away from under the blankets. “Fuck off.”

“Somebody is being ungrateful. Let me remind you that _you_ were the one with cold feet before. And did you just tell me to fuck off?” Erwin chuckles, clearly interested in the drastic development of Levi’s vocabulary. It’s been barely a few days and already such a colourful language is being formed.

“Tch, so what if I did? I learnt that from the evening show, okay.”

“Don’t just pick up the bad things, Levi,” Erwin ruffles his hair again and reaches behind Levi’s ear to slide the switch in one smooth motion. Levi’s warm now, and the points where their skins touch tingle nicely. “Good night, don’t let the bugs bite.”

In the midst of turning to sleep mode, Levi manages to reply. “No worries. I taste like latex, anyway.”

* * *

 

A week has passed, and the only thing Levi does at Erwin’s house is eat, bathe and sleep, all of which he can get by just fine without doing. Contrary to the endless tests and hardware modifications he went through at the research centre under Hange’s team’s supervision, Erwin only brings him to the underground laboratory at night every other day before they go to bed, when he hooks Levi up to the machines and monitors his progress.

 

System is 67% complete.The screen would flash, coaxing another sad smile from Erwin. Troubleshooting results: None. Error not identified.

 

At that exact moment, a series of images flash pass Levi’s sight at blinding speed. But just when he’s about to make out the pictures, Erwin unplugs the connection, and the images vanish.

 

Levi says nothing about it.

* * *

 

“I feel so useless,” Levi protests as he sits by the glass window, staring outside with dimmed curiousity. Early in the morning, the neighbourhood is quiet. Erwin continues to type away, switching between the multiple hologram screens floating in the air with dozens of graphs and data that Levi doesn’t give a damn about. “It’s like I’m a piece of metallic trash only here for decoration purposes.”

“You clean all the time,” Erwin points out. “It’s good enough.”

“I’m not a Roomba, for fuck’s sake,” Levi cusses, ignoring the condescending look on Erwin’s face. “What? I’m supposed to be revolutionary.”

Erwin shakes his head and takes off his glasses. “Make me some coffee, if you like.”

“You’re kidding me,” Levi mutters under his breath, glowering at Erwin who has now turned his attention back to his work. After a few hesitant moments, Levi stands and walks to the kitchen, pausing in his tracks to glare over his shoulder at a loudly snickering Erwin, clearly finding enjoyment in Levi’s misery.

“Oh and Levi, make some sandwiches while you’re at it!”

 

Minutes later, Levi reappears, slamming the coffee and plate of egg sandwiches onto the table. “You’re turning me into a shitty housewife.”

“Well, it _is_ one of your many programmed functions,” Erwin chuckles, bringing the mug to his lips and taking a sip. His blue eyes widen in delight, and he beams at Levi. “This tastes amazing, Levi! Where’d you learn how to make this?”

“I observed your daily coffee-making ritual countless times, already. I ought to know somehow, what with this super eidetic memory and all.”

Erwin takes another long sip, closing his eyes to savour the taste. “Thank you, Levi. I love it,” he says, stroking Levi’s arm lightly in gratitude. The touch seems all too familiar, but Levi can’t seem to point out why.

Levi ignores the warmth that radiates from the point where Erwin’s large hand rests on top of his, spreading outwards to heat his face up. _This is nothing_ , he says to himself as he pulls away to sit down again, slotting himself right next to Erwin on the couch. _This is nothing. This doesn’t mean anything._

 

He knows he’s not fooling anyone.

* * *

 

The third week Levi spends with Erwin, a strange man pays an unexpected visit. The minute he steps in, the man stares intensely at Levi. It’s loathing, detestation and overall sense of strong hatred at first sight for Levi, and he doesn’t even _know_ the man’s name yet.

“Dr. Nile,” Erwin says, the name rolling off his tongue harshly like sharp acid. The malicious glint in his eyes doesn’t go unnoticed, and it’s obvious that there’s an inexplicable tension between the two. “What brings you to my humble place today?”

“Cut the crap, Erwin. You know why I’m here,” Nile’s voice cut through Levi’s hearing, like coarse gravel that grazes and scratches against the road. “The government wants him.”

“You mean _you_ want him.”

“You’re not the best candidate for this project, Erwin. He’s better off with the Central, not with your little indie team.”

“I’m not handing him over to you sick bastards. Don’t think I’m not aware of the filthy plans you have in mind,” Erwin maintains a calm, collected composure, but Levi sees the waves of dark red anger whirling in him; Nile is riling him up. Levi is convinced that he can punch the despicable man through the walls and send him flying well further across the street, but he doesn’t do it. Not without Erwin’s command.

“He has a _malfunction_ , Erwin. Faulty, a broken machine.”

“Get out.”

“I’m telling you, you’re getting your personal issues mixed up in this, he’s not real—“

“ _Leave!_ ”

There is a brief exchange of challenging looks before Dr. Nile walks out the door reluctantly, but Erwin knows him well. Nile _will_ come back, perhaps with the other Central officers and a valid warrant.  And the next time, they won’t get so lucky.

* * *

 

One cloudless day, Erwin takes Levi out to the countryside away from the hustles and bustles of the city, where the horizon stretches as far as their imaginations can take and tall, leafy trees line the green patches of fresh grass. Levi is not amused.

“This is a bad joke,” Levi huffs, scowling in disgust when his shoes hit the grimy muddy ground, making a squishy sound. If the dirt gets in his system and shortcircuits him, he knows who to blame. “What’s a state-of-the-art, avant-garde, futuristic innovation doing in a place so far from civilization? You’re supposed to _fix_ me, not take me somewhere so remote that I can’t even access the satellite.”

“Relax, Levi. We’re here to take our minds off things. Don’t you feel tired being around technologies all the time?”

“No,” he answers defiantly. “In fact, I’m beginning to enjoy their company. Toaster is quite the friendly guy, we converse all the time. Fridge is having a little crush on him, so I’m helping them get together,” Levi rambles on, only stopping when he notices Erwin struggling to keep from laughing. Levi grimaces. “What do you expect? I understand their language. I get bored, so I talk.”

“I’m glad you made friends, Levi, but let’s enjoy today while we can,” Erwin says.

 

The next thing Levi knows is that he’s on a horse, clutching for dear life onto Erwin as they ride off to god knows where.

 

“Slow down, bastard!” Levi shouts, feeling the cool wind hitting his face at full speed. Erwin is just as reckless at riding as he is at driving, but with the way he maneuvers the horse through the muddy pathway like it’s his second nature, Levi can’t help thinking that Erwin has done this before. Many, many times.

They leap across a puddle and goes around a large tree. Erwin yells at him over his shoulder.

“Hold on tight, we don’t want you to fall off!”

The words echo in Levi’s head, but instead of fading, they get clearer with each passing second. The dashes of green around him blur, and he sees them again. The images.

 

_“Hold on tight, we don’t want you to fall off, do we?”_

 

Levi blinks his eyes rapidly, but he still sees it, Erwin in front of him -same blue eyes, same golden hair- in clothes different from the one he’s wearing before. Levi peers down and sees the identical uniform on himself. _Impossible._

This Erwin smiles gently at him and slows down to a halt. The horse neighs loudly in approval. Erwin’s green cloak is silky in his hands.

 

_“Levi, the wind feels nice today. Want to ride a little further?”_

 

Just as they’re about to move, Levi blinks again, and the image changes.

 

_“Captain! Two 10-meter class to your right!”_

 

There’s a desperate voice shrieking at him from behind. All of a sudden, he’s flying in the air, the surroundings spinning and dashing forward at him with blinding velocity, followed by unmistakable sounds of blades cutting through flesh. There’s blood on his face, blood on his hands, but they evaporate within seconds.

 _What the hell is this? Where the fuck am I?_ Erwin is nowhere to be seen now. Wasn’t he just right in front of him before?

 

_“Captain, the right wing has collapsed! An aberrant has broken through!”_

 

He sees people flying and falling. Shouting, and crying. It’s sickening.

Everywhere. They’re everywhere. _What in the world are those things?_

 

_“Capta—“_

 

Grayscale statics fills his vision. A screeching noise well beyond acceptable frequency forces him to cover his ears.

 

And then nothing.

 

“Levi, are you dizzy? We should get your vertigo control checked.”

He opens his eyes to see Erwin cupping his face, looking concerned and checking to determine if he’s alright. Erwin is back in his normal clothes, and so is he. They’ve stopped somewhere deeper in the lush shady forest. Something about the forest with the big, looming trees frightens him.

“I want to go home,” he says.

 

The ride back is slow and silent. Levi pushes the foreign thoughts away, the disturbing images and horrified screams. He tries to forget.

 

But it’s never that easy.

* * *

 

“Do I have a soul?” Levi asks one day, looking up at Erwin with curious eyes. He’s sitting in between Erwin’s legs, leaning against the broad chest while they watch a game of basketball –an all time favourite- on a particularly sweltering humid day.

Erwin initially appears taken aback by the sudden question, but before long, he starts smiling, hands tightening around Levi’s waist and pulling him impossibly closer. Levi groans, but leans back anyway. “I wish so, but I doubt it, Levi,” Erwin replies, raising an eyebrow in a questioning manner. “But you _are_ alive, and that’s what matters. Why’d you ask?”

“How do you define being alive? Isn’t having a soul a vital part of living?”

“How do you define a soul, then?” Erwin shoots back. “Tell me, Levi.”

Levi turns around to face Erwin, his eyes flickering.

“A soul is the immaterial essence, animating principle, or actuating cause of an individual life that liv—“

Rumbles of laughter escapes Erwin, cutting Levi’s words off. “No, no, no, if I want that, I could’ve looked it up. What does it _mean_ to _you_?”

 

Levi goes silent.

 

Dictionary application disabled.

Assessing inquiry...

Activating independent thoughts processing.

 

“When I’m with you,” Levi suddenly whispers, like it’s something dangerous, like it’s them against the world and what he’s about to say will change everything. He knows it will. “When I’m with you… I feel real.”

Erwin looks at him, deep affection reflected by his eyes. “You are. Every part of you is, including this,” he carefully takes Levi’s hand and places it on his chest, then pulls him into a tight embrace. Levi stiffens when Erwin bends a little to align their torsos, bodies flush against one another. “Feel it, Levi,” Erwin presses harder. “Feel your heartbeat against mine. You’re alive.”

Levi’s hand stops trembling. He focuses.

 

And he feels.

 

 _Thumpthumpthumpthump_ — _thump._

 

 

“I’m alive,” Levi breathes out, the world finally sinking in.

Levi doesn’t mention the way his heartbeats skip when Erwin presses a small, chaste kiss to his lips. But he knows something has changed in him, he acknowledges that, wants to explore this new feeling. Erwin tries to back away, but Levi’s hands are already around his neck and pulling him closer, closer, _closer._ It’s not enough. _It’s never enough._

They kiss and touch and kiss again, over and over. Levi wanting to understand, Erwin wanting to believe; two hearts meet and complement each other like pieces of puzzles, even when one is real and the other is not. It's lust -Levi knows it is, it's there in his system though it's not what he is intended for- but at the same time, it's something more. In a frenzied state, Levi wraps his lithe legs around Erwin's waist, and then Erwin's biting, sucking, marvelling at at the way Levi’s pale skin glistens and returns to white just seconds after, and _damn it_ , Erwin kind of regrets inventing such flawless skin. He can never mark Levi, not visibly, at least. But they move in absolute sync as if they’ve done this since forever, like Levi is Levi and not LEVI-001, and when he’s reduced to a melting mess, writhing and gasping _Erwin, Erwin_ , _more—ah—_

 

Erwin makes him feel complete, even when he isn’t.

* * *

 

Each night, Erwin talks to him before they call it a day. About his work. Theories. His dreams. About life. Everything.

 

Erwin claims it might help Levi remember, and if he does, Erwin can fix the problem faster. Since the system cannot seem to detect the underlying glitch, it’s up to Levi to actually find what is wrong with himself. Levi listens quietly, once in a while chiming in when he doesn’t fathom something or when the things Erwin says contradicts the factual information stored in his database, but most of the time, he only listens. To Erwin’s sweet, calming voice. To Erwin’s melodious, even breaths that softens when he gradually falls asleep.

One time, Erwin talks about life after death. “Levi, I think things in this world have had a life before the current one,” he says. “Everything, even the birds and the fishes. And you.” There’s that smile again, mellow and heartrending, like he wants to cry but he simply cannot.

 

Levi doesn’t sleep that night.

 

If ‘everything’ includes him, he wonders how many lives has he lived before he comes to this point. Do the people still remember him now? How many times has he shed tears? How many times has he fallen in love?

 

Has it always been Erwin?

 

 

 _I’ll kill you—You have something I lack--Trust me--I offer you my heart—Those wings of yours are real—Be careful—Levi, retreat!—I love you—Iloveyouiloveyouilove001110101101100101100110010101111011110001011010010100101011101010110101111010100010110_

 

The dreams never stop.

* * *

 

Perfection is something humans crave, yet fear. It’s something humans are not, and never will be, so when Professor Erwin Smith claims to have invented the epitome of perfection itself, many are not too happy about it.

It goes without saying that with the emergence of androids, human workforce will slowly, but surely, be overpowered and no longer in demand. With much higher productivity rate and close to naught percentage of errors made, and not to mention the low wear-and-tear maintenance costs, many companies and factories will turn to the Light Efficient Variable Intelligence series, subsequently incurring higher rate of unemployment. Countries might even deploy androids as soldiers; heartless, powerful and loyal, what more can they ask for?

Some people regard Professor Erwin Smith as a threat to humanity, and they’ll do _anything_ to stop the production of LEVI-001. Anything, including killing the man responsible for it.

 

 

They’re on their way back after shopping for groceries at night when Levi notices that something is amiss.

 

Unknown individual detected... 35 meters southward.

 

Levi sees it in his thermal sensors, a body of heat warmer than an average human approaching them from behind in a quick, steady pace. Higher heat emissions indicate negative emotions, and whoever this person is, he’s harboring a lot of resentment and hatred. Carefully, Levi calculates the distance between their current route and their house, and the approximate time taken for them to reach safely. The times clashes: with the speed at which the person is moving, he’ll catch up soon enough.

“Erwin…” Levi pulls at his sleeve to grab his attention, wanting to alert him of the incoming threat. Erwin turns to look, but it is then that Levi hears the trigger pulled and the silent whipping sound of bullet piercing the still air, speedily heading towards them. In less than a split second, Levi pushes Erwin aside. The sharp sound of metal hitting metal resounds, followed by fading footsteps running away in the distance.

Erwin’s heart stops, shaken by the sudden assault. _No… It can’t be…_

“Levi, what—“

Levi sways a little, but still stands upright. _Erwin is safe_ , he sighs in relief. He can’t afford to lose Erwin, not again, not in this world, not in this life.Every time he closes his eyes, Levi sees Commander Erwin Smith. The scenes replay like a never-ending loop of nightmare -hideous distorted faces and long rows of teeth, twisted limbs and dripping pools of crimson, the wings of freedom he tears from Erwin’s jacket that reeks of blood and the faint _Levi, Levi, Levi_ escaping pale lips- Levi thinks enough is enough. In this world he’ll heal, no sweat, because what a trifling, trivial damage this kind of wound is to him, to LEVI-001, _humanity’s hope_.  LEVI-001 is an android, a perfect creat—

 

 

Perfection is everything Levi is not. He is 33% away from perfect.

 

Levi raises a hand to his left chest where the bullet has hit him and touches it softly. His fingers come back wet. Red, and wet.

 

It takes a second for Erwin to realize that Levi has been shot, and another three seconds to notice that no, Levi doesn’t heal. In an instant, everything clicks together: it’s not the emotion department that is lacking, nor is it the limbs’ operation that is underdeveloped, the problem is that Levi is not invincible, although he should be. He’s vulnerable, like any other human is.

 

Gets a wound, bleeds and doesn’t heal.

 

_He’s not supposed to._

 

 

Levi collapses onto the ground with a thud.

“Damn it, Levi!” Erwin yells and runs to Levi’s side, kneeling to lift him up. The once ashen pavement is now stained in blotches of red, and Levi takes in a shaky breath through open mouth and trembling lips. It’s painful, so _painful and scary and cold,_ he thinks he’s not supposed to feel this; LEVI-001 shouldn’t feel anything at all. But Levi is now more human than he imagines he can ever be, knows fear, understands loneliness, feels pain and longing and _love_.

 

 _You are real,_ he hears Erwin’s words, again and again in his head. _Feel your heartbeat against mine, Levi._

 

“It hurts,” Levi breathes out, voice hitching in his throat. “Erwin… it hurts.”

 

He watches Erwin closely, doesn’t struggle when Erwin holds his limp body in his strong arms and runs into the house, straight into the makeshift lab with staggering steps. He sees the way Erwin –drenched in blood, _Levi’s blood-_ scrambles with tangled wires and clips and all sorts of intricate devices, desperation showing through his uncharacteristic haste and clumsiness. “Hange, this is an emergency. Bring the squad over now!” Erwin almost shouts into the phone. A large wire is now connected to the base of Levi’s neck, constantly sending electrical impulses down his spine to keep the system from switching off, while Erwin starts to work on patching the little gaping hole on his chest.

“Levi… Stay with me. Shit, I screwed up, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…”

Levi listens, but doesn’t reply. He feels his hands getting cold, bright sparks from his upper abdomen appearing more frequent and the sensations in his legs already gone. The wound on his chest still bleeds, but it doesn’t hurt anymore, just numb and dully throbbing. _This is it._

“Erwin,” he mutters softly, and reaches out to still Erwin’s hand. It quivers in his grip. “It’s okay.”

Erwin’s eyes widen, and even through his hazy and clouded sight, Levi can see the fright and despair in those sky blue orbs. The look doesn’t suit Erwin at all, Levi thinks, he’ll very much prefer to see his smile. With shaky hands, Levi pulls Erwin closer by the neck and leans for a kiss, messy and deep but tender, loving and thankful because yes, Levi is capable of loving now, always has been, always will be.

Levi pulls back from the kiss reluctantly, his lips meeting empty air. Erwin tries to get up and reach for the machines again, but Levi stops him, fingertips dancing on Erwin’s wet cheek, thumbing it softly. “Stop crying, _commander_ ,” he says, and relishes in the way Erwin’s brilliant eyes light up like they _always_ do the thousand first times they met.

“You remember…” Erwin says, breathless, and he runs his thumb over Levi’s cold lips, presses a kiss to Levi’s forehead.

 

Levi’s eyes flicker.

 

Searching for files... Found 801157143 items matching with ‘LOVE’.

Accessing files...

 

Waves of images, sounds and clips flood LEVI-001’s system, coursing through his every fiber, filling him with nothing but memories.

The world changes each time, Levi can recall now. It’s always a possibility -that 0.01% chance of not meeting Erwin, of Erwin not meeting him. In this world, Erwin creates him from scratch because he feels that something’s missing. But the memories, the _love_ , they come naturally, they make him human. Levi thinks that in another dimension where Erwin Smith is nothing but non-existent, he’ll do the same, too.

The thousand first times they meet, the thousand last kisses they share, Levi knows all of these don’t differ that much, anyway. They’ll always wind up coming back for more.

 

_“Erwin, about this little theory of yours… What happens when we live in a world without each other?”_

_“It’s a life as good as being dead.”_

_“Then promise me you’ll find me each time. Promise me we’ll meet again.”_

_“Always.”_

 

Levi smiles softly, and closes his eyes for one last time.

 

“I remember.”

 

 

System is shutting down—

 

 

 

LEVI-001’s heartbeat disappears.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry if the story is really weird, I kinda wanted to write a robot fic (after watching Wall-E, god knows how that idea came about) but I also wanted to write reincarnation, so the two just merged somehow and this happened. I promise there'll be happier ones soon. Kudos and comments are appreciated ❤


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